Do you know this feeling and thoughts when you hear “We do it because this is how it’s done” “It’s always been done this way” “You can’t do it like that” “It’s not supposed to be like this” the list goes on.
Usually this refers to “how life is meant to be lived” … a certain way, the socially acceptable thing to do…. finish high school, go to college, find a partner, date for x years, get engaged, get married, buy a house, have a career, have children, retire, die….
I don’t know about you but when I hear those things everything inside of me starts to crinch. It makes me feel unease and I instantly start to question “Why???” “Why the heck should I do something “just because this is how it’s done” – it drives me crazy when the only reason people can give me is “We’ve always done it like that”.
Have you ever stopped and asked yourself
“Is this actually the ONLY way of how we can do it?”
And what does it mean when we try a different way?
Would the world really end?
Are all people (and there are plenty) who do it “differently” “outside the norm” – really abnormal? Are they weird?
Well, to be honest, a lot of people would actually think so. A lot of people will not understand why you don’t have to get married before having kids, why it’s not important to you to work in a well-paid corporate job to help make rich companies even richer. A lot of people think you are crazy and something went wrong with you when you were growing up for thinking “There’s got to be another way”. They don’t understand that your search for happiness is not equal to theirs.
To be brutally honest, I don’t understand them. And I will make the small assumption that when you’re reading this you don’t either.
I’m thinking that you are also questioning the “status quo” – that when you hear “this is how you do it” also makes you question “really???” and instantly look for another way.
I think there are those people who will do things differently out of rebellion. Just for the sake of pissing other people off and for the sake of being “different” – they like standing out from the crowd and be “the outsiders of society” – and that is totally cool. But I think you and me – for us – we’re doing it out of a different reason. We’re doing it because we know that our happiness is somewhere else. That we are the creators of our own lives and dreams. That we can actually do whatever we want to do with our lives. We are in the lucky position that we can.
I’m on a mission to find my own rules right now – it is an ongoing journey, isn’t it? It isn’t an easy one either, but I’m sure it will be worthwhile in the end. Hang on, not just in the end – the ride itself is worth it every struggle and low point that we have to endure while on it. Are you going to join me?